Tag Archives: Tim Vine

Does God LOL?

25 Jul

PP 178x110mm 12mmDear Friends

It may come as a surprise to you that this humble clergyman was asked (last year) to contribute to veritable tome entitled ‘Does God LOL?’ 

If you have not yet yet splashed out for this excellent book (in aid of a most worthy charity called Mary’s Meals, I hasten to add) allow me to give you a sneak preview of  my contribution in the hope that you may wish to part with your hard-earned cash and buy it. 

So here it is!

 

‘Dear friends

What a privilege it is for this humble clergyman to have been asked to contribute to this veritable tome and more so that I find myself in the company of so many comedic luminaries.

Whilst I am more than prepared to have a stab at lightening your countenance a tad I am sure that the chief reason for my being included is to bring a little gravitas to the question posed: ‘Does God LOL?’.

That said, I will confess to once concocting a ‘gag’ (as I believe it is called in the business) and it would be remiss of me to let the moment pass without recounting it. Who knows where this might lead should the likes of my fellow contributors such as Mr Ken Dodd or Mr Tim Vine chance upon my proffering and give me the proverbial ‘thumbs up’?

It would surely be a feather in my cap at the local ministers’ fraternal where my regular attempts to interject a spot of humour (to oil the somewhat rusty wheels of ecumenism) usually go down about as well as someone bringing a ‘tongue’ at St.Cliff’s.

Those of you who have followed my journey for some time will be aware that it was with much trepidation that I entered onto the World Wide Super Highway and I am still somewhat ‘wet behind the ears’ when it comes to the popular vocabulary employed by my fellow travellers.

Thus it was my good lady wife who helpfully enlightened me as to the meaning of the appendage ‘LOL’ but not before I had got myself in a bit of a pickle with a message on the Facebook internet portal to old Mr McMurtry (a crusty and cantankerous member of my charge;St.Cliff’s).

Having given much of his time and effort to picking holes in my weekly sermons he ‘messaged’ my good self to inform me that my apparently erroneous theology had finally driven him to pack his proverbial bags and to seek pastures new.

Having recently preached on forgiveness (chiefly for my own benefit to assuage the ire of the fearsome matriarchs of St.Cliff’s kitchens after I inadvertently forgot to return a Brillo Pad which I purloined in the services of removing some graffiti to a sign outside our church – one particular member of my team did not appreciate the addition of the letter ‘R’ to the end of the warning; ‘SOFT VERGE’) I had little choice but to send him on his way with my blessing (and love, or so I thought).

It was only later that I discovered that ‘LOL’ does not in fact stand for Lots of Love (as I had imagined) but Laugh Out Loud.

Having ‘signed off’ my reply to old Mr McMurtry with the aforementioned ‘LOL’ (in all innocence) I was therefore somewhat surprised to find a response, by return, recanting his previous exit strategy and informing me that he was now staying put to spite me for my insensitive ‘LOL’, albeit it inadvertent on my part.

It would appear that I, like St.Paul, must also endure a ‘thorn in the flesh’ (in my case, in the guise of old Mr McMurtry).

Anyway, without further ado, here is my aforementioned ‘gag’ .

“Why did the chicken cross the road?”

“That is not the question rather, what on earth was the chicken doing in the story of the Good Samaritan in the first place?”

I will admit that my humour may be a little too clever for some but I trust that, with time, the penny will drop and the joke will be got.

So, to the question at hand – ‘Does God LOL?’.

In that God called someone like me to be a veritable minister of the gospel I can only conclude that he most assuredly does.

Onward and upward

Derek’

 

 You can also find me at www.derekthecleric.com